A Perfect Worker

Illustrations by: Laura Menchaca

A very long time ago, in the 956 Kingdom, a young boy named Kevin had just graduated from high school and could not attend college because it was too expensive. He had to find a job to pay for his abuelita’s medicine; she is old and sick.

Weeks passed, and he was rejected by the many jobs he applied for. Then, Kevin was finally hired by Whataburger. The next day was orientation day. 

Kevin is ready to start getting that bread and goes to Whataburger. As Kevin enters the restaurant, he is greeted by one of the most beautiful girls in the 986 Kingdom, Maria Juana.

“Hey there, Kevin!” exclaimed Maria Juana as she waved her hand from side to side. “I’ll be one in charge of your orientation today! Follow me!”

Embarrassed, Kevin nods and quickly follows Maria Juana. She taught Kevin how to open the register, clean the tables, take orders at the drive-through, and cook the perfect burger. After a long training day, Maria Juana took Kevin to the Spatula room. 

The Spatula room is as the name says. A room that has a Spatula. But it’s not a regular Spatula; this one is special as it was forged by the Whataburger god, Bob. Or so the legend says.

Kevin and Maria Juana walk inside the room. It’s empty; the only thing inside is a spatula stuck in a rock. Kevin does not care about the spatula but is more surprised that this room exists inside a Whataburger. Then again, not much ever made sense in the 956 Kingdom.

“Legend says that whoever has a pure, honest, and courageous heart will be able to pick up the golden spatula,” says Maria Juana. “And the one that possesses the golden spatula will gain the powers of the Whataburger god.”

Maria Juana then points at the spatula and looks at Kevin. “Try and pick it up; it’s part of your initiation to become part of the Whataburger team.”

Kevin wanted to give it a try. He thought that if he could pick it up, he could woo Maria Juana.

He stands before the spatula and wraps both hands on the handle. With all of his strength, he pulls up. But the spatula does not budge. Kevin tries again but nothing. If he continues any longer, his arms will probably break.

“I can’t do it,” Kevin says as he falls to the floor, exhausted. “I guess I am not worthy.”

“It’s alright. I don’t believe in those things. Anyways, it’s just a legend,” Maria Juana extends her hand to help Kevin stand up. “Regardless, you are part of the team now!”

Kevin smiles at her. Maybe working at Whataburger won’t be so bad afterward. 

Kevin tried to be the best at his work. He wakes up early and put on his uniform, gloves, mask, cap and vest to work. Kevin paid for his abuelita’s medicine and hospital bills with the money he got from his job. For this reason, many of his co-workers made fun of him because he still lived with his abuelita.

Although Kevin was tired of all the bullying, he was too much of a coward to do anything about it.

Recently, TV channels have been filled with news about the new villains in town. The most powerful of them all is Takuacheman. Apparently, he used to work at a chemical lab where they experimented with possums, and one day he got bitten by one, which gave him the powers of a possum.

One day, while frying some fries at Whataburger, there was a loud KABOOM.

People ran out of the restaurant, some kids children, and others peed in their pants. The restaurant windows were broken, and half the wall was in shambles.

Takuacheman came inside the restaurant on top of an army of possums. He had a long tail, nails and a pointy nose and used a suit covered in gray fur.

“I came to take the sacred spatula!” said Takuacheman as his army of possums began to take over the Whataburger. “And no one can stop me!” “The sacred spatula can only be taken by someone worthy!” Maria Juana screamed from the counter. “You will never have it!” 

Suddenly, Takuacheman goes went the counter and pushed Kevin a few meters away. He took Maria Juana as a hostage and pointed at Kevin. “You! Bring me the spatula, or I’ll kill her!”

Kevin ran towards the secret room to find the spatula. In the middle of the room, there it was. The sacred spatula is still intact, stuck in the rock.

He put his two hands on the spatula’s handle and tried to pull it off. However, it was futile. No matter how much he tried, he couldn’t take the spatula away from the rock.

As afraid as he was, Kevin went back to the counter of Whataburger, where Takuacheman was still holding Maria Juana hostage.

“Let her go!” Kevin said as he started throwing burgers, fries, and cups at Takuacheman.

The villain just laughed at Kevin’s attempts to attack him. However, he was also careless, and ketchup landed in his right eye.

Infuriated, Takuacheman walked toward Kevin and started punching him. He kicked him all over his body, hit his face, and threw him against the wall. Yet, Kevin was still trying to fight. He tried to stand up and throw a few punches at Takuacheman even though the blood in his eyes stopped him from seeing properly.

But, Takuacheman was more powerful than him, and with one quick punch, he threw Kevin against the wall. The impact made the entire wall fall into Kevin, crushing his body.

“Kevin!” Maria Juana screamed as she saw Kevin’s motionless body on the floor, under the wall.

Takuacheman then went to Maria Juana and grabbed her by the arm. His army of possums followed him.

“If I don’t get the sacred spatula, I’ll feed you to my possums!”

Still conscious, Kevin could hear Maria Juana’s scream. His body was not responding, and he felt like he could pass out at any moment. He tried again and again, but felt his eyes starting to close. Kevin’s last wish was to have the power and strength to help others. Maria Juana was still crying and screaming as Takuacheman was about to feed her to his possums.

Suddenly, there was lighting. It was bright and blinding as it struck Kevin’s body. Even Takuacheman was having a hard time looking now at the entity in front of him. His possums ran away in fear as the new figure approached him.

He wore a white and orange suit with an orange cape and a ‘W’ on his chest. In his right hand he was holding the sacred spatula.

“Who are you?” asked Takuacheman as he let go of Maria Juana, who ran and hid behind the soda dispenser.

“I am Whataman.”

Whataman used his spatula to evoke all the fries, burgers and drinks and ordered them to attack Takuacheman. As he screamed in pain, he sent his possums to attack Whataman too, but it was futile. Whataman gave them small burgers for them to eat. Then, he went to Takuacheman and they started fighting. Their fight was so intense that Whataburger collapsed.

There were possums everywhere, burgers, ketchup, sodas, and more. In the end, Whataman was victorious. Takuacheman fled the scene, followed by the little possums.

Whataman then went to check on Maria Juana to ensure she was safe. After ensuring no harm was done, Whataman flew out of the Whataburger.

Days later, TV channels were filled with news of the new superhero. No one knows his identity; they only know he goes as Whataman. He protects all Whatburgers and their clients against evil.

And that’s the origin story of how the 956 Kingdom got a new hero. For most, he is Whataman, to a few, his name is Kevin, the perfect worker.

The End.