September 19, 2024

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Dear Tio Paco,

I moved in with a friend of mine at the beginning of the summer. We’re in a one bedroom apartment near the university, the rent is $540 a month not including internet or other utilities. She had two part jobs when we first moved in together and no savings. Since then I’ve learned she is really irresponsible with money. She spends tons pre-ordering video games or on merch at conventions. That would be fine, but a month after we moved in together she quit both her jobs. She said she just needed a break. She payed rent that month and the month after, but by the third month she didn’t have enough money. I covered it for her and told her to get another job, but she hasn’t yet.

She doesn’t pitch in for things like groceries either and then she wastes food by not refrigerating her leftovers. Like she’ll make macaroni and serve herself a bowl then leave the rest in the pot on the stove to harden and get all gross. If I see it early enough I’ll put it in Tupperware and it’ll be saved, but sometimes I don’t notice and it goes bad. I ask her to save the food and she says she will, but she doesn’t. Apparently she only likes to eat food fresh anyway, so that’s why it doesn’t seem important to her. And she thinks because a lot of it is food from the Student Pantry it shouldn’t matter.

We both signed a six month lease and it’s only been three and a half months. What should I do? I don’t want to pay her half of the rent again.

Sincerely,

An Unhappy Roommate

 

Dear Unhappy Pendeja,

Puta madre… your friend sounds as bad as a roommate you find on craigslist. If her name was the only one on the lease, I would say vete a la chingada! But right now, it seems like you’re up a shit creek.

For the macaroni problem, it’s simple: compra los little easy macs. If she misses another month’s rent, change the locks when she’s gone and pawn her stuff. May la Virgen be with you, and I hope this helps.

(Pulse magazine is not responsible for the opinions expressed in these letters or actions taken on advice)

Dios la bendiga,

Tio Paco

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